Diary Entry: Mental Battle


2020 is really not the year. This week has just been crazy. Bad news from left to right. Several people that I know passing away to someone that I care losing a job.

My mind has been acting up. I’ve been having PTSD symptoms again. That is why, I’ve been to the beach this whole week. I deleted Facebook and Instagram App just to stay away from other information. I just need to calm myself. Thus, I am blogging.

Maybe, I will write more in here so only the people that follows this website will know what’s up with me.

I got some bad news Monday, three people passing away. But, the third person really hit me. I cried two nights ago, full chaos emotion. Flashbacks, trauma-induced memories, and guilt. I took sleeping pills because my mind was just going wild at night. Then, I went to the beach and calm my mind with the water.

Then, today, I got some more bad news with my family. They need my help so I have no time to be depressed about it. I have to stay strong for them. I am so glad that the tv show, Big Brother is back because I get distracted by watching the live feeds.

I am just sad and feels alone. But I think I will be alright. I know how to deal with these strong mental disorientation.